Even if at the moment the subtleties of filling divorce docs have taken away all your vitality, and all you can do is lie on the couch, do not think that this will last forever. Sooner or later apathy and bitterness will pass, and then you will have to move on. Psychologists give a lot of different tips on how to survive a divorce, and one of the methods is to get carried away with something new (or a well-forgotten old one) and start scooping up new strengths in creativity, sports, travel – anything you really like. In this article, we share ways to find yourself anew, discover new talents in yourself, and finally heal.
Always Say Yes
Remember the movie of the same name? So, the name of this film in itself is a very strong emotional message, and when you let it into your life, you simultaneously allow new opportunities to appear on your way. You are no longer bound by marriage, you can forget about your divorce papers, and therefore should not notify your soulmate before you want to do something that you really want. Therefore, agree to all the offers that you receive, for example, go to a corporate party, spend a weekend in the country, visit an exhibition, and so on.
The only exception to this advice is consent to a new date with the opposite sex, but only until you feel that you are ready for it.
Remember the Things You Liked before Marriage
Very often, marriage, especially knowingly doomed to fill out divorce papers online forces us to abandon our hobbies and the things that we loved before. The burden of worries about home, family, children and our soulmate, which we take on ourselves voluntarily, in the hope of gaining universal happiness, leads to the fact that you can no longer afford to manage your time as you would like it to. Or even if you have this opportunity, at the end of the day there is simply no more strength and energy to do anything else than just go to bed.
However, now you are spared it. And if the divorce was your relief, it means that part of the hated duties disappeared forever, and now you just need to remember what you liked before and start doing these things again.
Ask Your Children about the Things They Want to Do with You
In addition to being a way to find new talents and hobbies, it is also a way to maintain the emotional connection with your children that they need after divorce. If your children are more than three years old, then they are quite capable of telling you what they would like to do with you. Do not give up their ideas, even if you don’t really want to paint or go for a bike ride. Remember always say yes? And even if a certain activity seems relatively pointless to you, it still helps to escape from thoughts about divorce papers and all other legal procedures that you will need to go through.
Go in for Sports
This is universal advice that will suit everyone without exception. Why is this so?
- Firstly, regular exercise will not allow you to spoil your figure, especially if you tend to compensate for emotional experiences with food.
- Secondly, sports are a great antidepressant and a way to cleanse your head of unnecessary thoughts and worries.
- Thirdly, sport is a source of energy that you need so much now to start moving on and looking for yourself anew.
- And fourthly, playing sports is a great opportunity to meet new people, make new friends and finally get rid of your old life and bad habits.
Dig out Your Childhood Dreams
Surely, when you were a child, you dreamed about something or did something that you especially liked. Adulthood could play a trick on your childhood dreams, and make you abandon them in favor of “adult priorities”. Now is the time to revive these dreams and talents. Perhaps you wanted to become a fashion designer – try creating some sketches. Or you wrote beautiful verses – try putting your experiences in rhyming lines. Even if these actions do not rediscover your true passion, then at least you will know what ideas are definitely not working.
Look for the Ideas That Were Helpful to Other People
And finally, let’s talk about other ideas. A psychologist is, of course, a good way to get yourself out of apathy after a divorce, online divorce service, lawyers and other bureaucratic red tapes. However, with so much free information online, it is quite possible to help yourself independently. And if you are looking for an activity that can help you deal with your feelings, ask people who already had this experience about what helped them. It is very likely that the advice of another person will be suitable for you – and even more so, it will already be a proven method by someone. Therefore, open social networks, forums, ask and receive answers.